How to Develop an Attitude of Gratitude

I am re-printing this article today with a head cold! As I was working earlier in the day, I was beginning to get very agitated and my thoughts turned more and more negative.  I rested for 20 minutes and thought to my myself, “what do I tell my clients to do when this happens to them?” Here’s an article I wrote a few years ago I want to share with all the women in my life.

Rethinking My Attitude of Gratitude

Gratefulness: In Time for the Thanksgiving Holiday …

In coaching, I often have my clients text me a daily gratitude list (2-3) for the first couple of weeks. Then, I recommend they find a gratitude buddy, somebody they trust and respect, to share and exchange a minimum of one new grateful item each day.

Interestingly, most people experience a very strong urge to think negatively about themselves. And, based on the chaos in the world, our negative thoughts are constantly reinforced. The best defense is to shift your own mindset, in order to bring something positive into your thought process. It is especially important to do just before bed.

My friend and I texted each other for three months every night while she was going through problems in her marriage. We didn’t need to talk about it, each night in our gratefulness, we could tell where the focus was in each other’s lives. In other words, we focused on what mattered!

Here’s something men and women can do to show gratitude in primary relationships. For the men, learn what women want most; to be understood, respected, and listened to (URL). For women, practice the 4 A’s with the man in your life; acknowledge, accept, affirm, and appreciate. Men or women, we don’t attract that which we want, we attract that which we are. Being grateful enhances the relationship and puts the focus on the strengths in it. Relationships aren’t 50-50, they are 100-100. As you bring your 100% into it, what you project attracts the best in them.

What are you grateful for in your life? Who are the people that bring you joy? How do you appreciate them or yourself daily? Are you willing to openly and frequently express words of gratitude to others? Think of doing this with children. Children live what they learn. Teach them to consistently shift their negative thoughts to positive outcomes.

If over 70% of our thoughts are typically negative (the human condition), how do you begin to increase the good thoughts in your mind to change this statistic for yourself. Success can simply be as close as one degree of shift to make a huge difference. I created Prosperity IQ (P-IQ)® Mindset Assessment to help you expand your abundance-thinking power. 

What do you do?

  • First, you must be willing to bring the positive to consciousness. Just as it takes at least 21-24 days of focused effort to change any habit, training your brain to notice the blessings and positive things in life takes conscious practice.
  • The best way to kick-start this practice is at the end of each day, write down or text three things you are grateful for. When you do this, you are forcing your brain to review good moments that happened in the last 24 hours.

As you build a gratitude list, you are developing a positive mindset and perspective of the world that counteracts the cultural bias for negativity from the news.

It does not have to be monumental; it could be as simple as you found a parking space closer to the door, the trash was emptied when you got home, you fit into an outfit you haven’t been able to wear for a while, your boss complimented your work, your children are safely home, your significant other brought you flowers with a thank you note.

Today, I am thankful for …

Today, I am thankful for …

Today, I am thankful for …

Happy Thanksgiving!

Gloria Manchester, ICF-ACC, Prosperity-Builder Coach, New Money Story® Mentor Coach, certified in Conversational Intelligence, & an Amazon bestselling author.